The Light Within Me by Carly Fall

Honestly, it all comes down to this being very poorly written: cardboard characters, unrealistic plot, unbelievable dialogue, and a liberal ‘lifting’ of similar plots from other (much better) books. At the start of the 5th chapter, when the info dumping was still going on and the story hadn’t even started yet, I knew I was in trouble. The book was hitting every branch on the cliche tree and still free falling fast. Clearly, the inspiration was the Black Dagger Brotherhood series of books but without the charm.

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Story: Aristocratic alien smoky entities from another planet (whose eyes glitter/glow at night) have taken alpha male forms on earth in order to hunt down escaped criminals from their planet. Six of them live together in an abandoned missile silo when one falls for an awkward woman with a hidden past that might just connect her to the alien men.

After slogging through the egregious info dumps setting up the story, it became obvious that the book had serious writing problems. E.g., believability issues (our main male character bafflingly takes pains to namedrop, noting that he has on his Bose headphones, is using his Viking range, and is in a Burberry shorts) and characterization issues (he’s described as never breaking the law and very upstanding yet swears like a sailor and is a jerk to everyone).

Cue Mary Sue female character, awkward and unsure of herself, and about to be swept off her feet by our super clean, macho, swearing, alien. She’ll need to be saved often, of course, but she’ll win the hearts of all the guys in the end, now won’t she? I didn’t like her character and I didn’t like the so-over-the-top alpha male, either. Again, they both felt like romance novel cliches – pandering to a lowest common denominator and very poorly constructed.  Because foul mouthed single alien bachelors are always neat, brand whores, and macho but with a heart of gold, right?

There are much better romances out there – alpha or otherwise.

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